#512 – Journey Of Attachment: Help! I’m Dating an Avoidant!
Are you in a relationship or dating someone who’s more robot than human; someone who intellectualizes everything and doesn’t show any warmth? Or what about someone who makes big promises all the time and never, ever follows through? Or maybe you’re with someone who appears and disappears without warning, pretending it’s normal, making you think YOU are the crazy one? These are signs of an Avoidant relationship. If you find yourself in one, you have to ask yourself… why are you there? Is it because you mistake those butterfly feelings for real love?
Those feelings actually stem from a fear of abandonment. You’re trying to get the other person to cooperate with you and see your value, fearing they will leave you at any moment. It’s chemistry mixed with anxiety. There is also zero consistency in these relationships. So if you’re in a situation like this, realize it’s not healthy and look at how you got here. You made the choice to be with an Avoidant… which means you are also an Avoidant. Or an Anxious Avoidant. Securely attached people do not, I repeat do NOT, engage with people like this. Nobody who loves and accepts themself will put up with someone who is inconsistent and won’t emotionally commit. Period. In this episode I’ll show you how to identify what blocks you from giving to yourself and showing yourself love. Because this lack of self-love is what leads you to seek it from people who are unable to give it.
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