Coach Alexis Reid
I spent much of my life being someone else in order to be accepted. That meant doing things to fit in, even if they didn’t feel right or it wasn’t what I wanted. Other people always came first, and their opinion of me was more important than my own self-worth. This kept me in a toxic marriage for far too long, not believing I deserved better. I went through countless hours of psychotherapy, Landmark Forum, Reiki and soul-sucking introspection. Always stuck in my head, I tried to intellectually apply what I had learned, but fear always kept me from conquering the hurdles of life.
Filing for divorce was a turning point. I had to finally accept that my marriage was over—no more hiding and avoiding. After years of stuffing my emotions down, I hit a tipping point and everything spewed out. It was overwhelming and scary, but I eventually worked through it (emotionally, not intellectually) and I was truly surprised by my resiliency.
I started accepting my role and quit looking for validation from others. Now it’s easier to put myself first. I do still get triggered with old stuff, but when that happens I sit with it and decide how to respond. I’m no longer afraid to speak my truth and fear the other person’s response, which makes me feel like I can breathe again. I’ve also let go of expectations (that was a tough one!), and my people-pleasing days are behind me.
Because of what I went through with my divorce, I’m particularly attuned to women who are going through a difficult time in their relationship. I was there, so I know how it feels to be scared, frozen, lost, confused and even emotionally abused. Using my experience to connect with other women and guide them through their own journey is incredibly rewarding… it’s the reason I started coaching.
The emotional work I’ve done these last several years, including coaching with Tracy, has made me a happier, more confident person. I’ve stopped settling for breadcrumbs because now I believe I deserve more. Living in the Midwest I love to travel, meditate, hike, run, garden and relax on Lake Michigan. Decorating is another passion of mine—taking a space and putting my touch on it. Interestingly, decorating has become a metaphor for my life. It takes time to get things the way I want, requiring patience and a focus on the end result. Sometimes the color is off or I can’t find the right table, but if I’m patient, I find what I’m looking for. A room doesn’t decorate itself; it takes continual action. Mistakes happen, so I accept them and try again. Now, that’s how I live my life.
To set up a Discovery Session with Alexis, email firstname.lastname@example.org